There were three of us
in the theater—me and two other White women watching Anita: Speaking Truth to
Power, the documentary chronicling the story of Anita Hill’s testimony of
sexual harassment against then Supreme Court nominee Clarence Thomas. A young
woman in my 20s, I remember being transfixed along with the rest of the nation
in front of the TV.
My support of Anita
Hill never wavered, and I defended her against those who thought she must have
had some ulterior motive for waiting for so long to speak her truth. Though I
didn’t have a verbal reference point for sexual harassment before the hearings,
I knew that it existed because I had both experienced it and witnessed it at
the hospital where I worked. Harassment
and abuse of Black women occurred with such regularity that it almost seemed
normal.
During my last year of
high school, I started working part-time in the billing department. One day I
came to work really sick. My throat felt like inflamed golf balls had found
their way inside, and I had a mouth full of canker sores. My sister-in-law, who
was also my supervisor, sent me to see the Asian doctor. He was quiet and meek,
not loud and impatient like some of the others. She thought he was trustworthy.
After he looked down my throat and in my mouth, and pressed on my glands, he instructed
me to remove my gown. I thought it was odd, but I complied. He was the doctor;
I was the patient. While examining my breasts, “Bite?” he asked as he noticed
the scar on my breast. “No, a burn,” I replied. He nodded and wrote me a
prescription. I got dressed and returned to work, but I never said anything to
anyone about the exam. I silenced myself, and I didn’t know why.
Located in a blighted area on the west side of
Chicago, most of the patients received public assistance. So, race, class and
gender were the perfect combination for rampant unwanted sexual attention. When
I changed departments and worked as an outpatient clerk, I was responsible for
filling out requisitions for lab work, x-rays, ultra sounds etc. per the
doctor’s request. There was this weird sexual dynamic in place that Black women
were play things for the men in the hospital. We didn’t have rights or feelings
as employees or patients that mattered most of the time.
One evening I was working alone when I felt a
hand on my hip and hot breath on my neck. My heart raced. I turned quickly and
looked into the face of the orthopedic surgeon who saw patients in between
surgeries and rounds on Fridays. Until that day, our interactions had been
professional yet friendly. When I asked him what was he doing, and why were his
hands on me, he turned red, and said, “I can’t afford to touch you!” I couldn’t
believe my ears. This man had just insinuated that I was a whore. I was livid!
I didn’t know what I
was going to do, but I was going to do something. I was going to report him,
but I didn’t know how to go about it. So, I confided in a couple of my
co-workers--Black women who I trusted women--who advised me not to report the
incident. They said I was a clerk and he was a doctor and that I was just
making trouble for myself. I refused to be silent. I was going to speak my
truth even if it meant I was the only person who heard my voice.
I witnessed the mistreatment that the patients
received from the doctors. I know how the female employees were often times
treated, and I couldn’t let it go. I had to take a stand, and I accepted that
whatever happened as a result of me reporting him, I was going to be okay. So,
I wrote a letter to the medical director--a woman—that evening before I left, and
then I followed up with a phone call Monday morning. She assured me that she
would take care of it, and she did. He was hostile after that and he would tell
the patients that I liked to write letters. I didn't care what he said so long
as he knew that I had a right to voice my concerns about his unethical
behavior.
There were patients who
described troubling sexual scenarios with the one of the obstetric-gynecologists.
One woman laughed as she told me that
the doctor stuck his hands in his pants and moved his finger around like a penis
and said, “You see what you do to me.” There
was another woman who came into the office crying after seeing the same doctor.
She had come in with a discharge from her breast and when she shared her
concern with the physician, he told her to tell her boyfriend to stop sucking
so hard on it. I never heard any of the women complain to the hospital
administration. They just accepted it. It’s hard to speak truth to power when
your truth has been horribly skewed by myths and stereotypes.
If I didn’t have value
myself, no one else was going to either. We had a patient who liked to talk
about what he wanted to suck and lick. He did this every time he came into the
office. My department was all women of color and we all complained, but the
patient was never reprimanded. We were told he was a patient; just ignore him.
Sometimes he would sit in the waiting area making such obscene gestures that I
would just close the door. But one day, a new administrator, a White woman, was
walking down the hall and when she passed the patient he said, “I ain’t
prejudiced; I eat White p@##$, too!” He was banned from the premises after
that.
All of these incidents
came rushing back to me as I sat in the theater in disbelief at the ridiculous
questions the Senate Committee was throwing at Anita Hill as if to trip her up
and catch her in a lie--that or they got some perverse pleasure out of having
her give details of the nasty things that were said.
Reliving the testimony
from an adult perspective, I was even more convinced that Clarence Thomas had
lied. The saddest thing about the entire episode is that Anita Hill’s testimony
was a mere bump in the road of Clarence Thomas journey to the Supreme Court. A
woman in the movie said, “It wasn’t about truth; it was about winning.” And it
was clear that her testimony was never about truth. They didn’t want to know if
it was true because then they would be forced to deal with the fall out of
unchecked sexual harassment. It was easier to just throw Anita Hill under the
bus.
From my understanding
of race and gender in this country, I knew that the all-White senate had no
point of reference for Anita Hill's predicament especially when most of them
probably had little if any regard for the safety of Black women. There was no
consideration given to Anita Hill's plight as a Black woman. It played right
into the sexual stereotype of the Black woman's wonton sexual appetite. If we
can't be raped, surely we cannot be harassed.
When Clarence Tomas hit
them with the race card, it was over. He called the hearing a “circus and a
national disgrace” a “high tech lynching for uppity Negroes” who would be hung
by the U. S. Senate rather than from a
tree for daring to speak up for themselves. It was brilliant! Even though there were other women that could
have backed up Hill’s testimony with lurid stories of their own, they were
never called. The Senate Committee didn’t want to look like a bunch of racists
after Thomas’ remarks because we know racism only happens to Black men, and
sexual assault only happens to White women. There was no place in the
conversation to discuss the bruised and battered bodies of Black women.
Today, I hear the term sexual harassment being flippantly tossed around almost as if it were a joke. I don’t even know where we are in a struggle against abuse and harassment because we seem to have lost our way. But I know the fight must continue. I left the theater thankful for Anita Hill’s bravery on that October day back in 1991. She reminded me that even in the most adverse circumstances how important it is to continue to speak our truth to power. Sexual harassment and abuse of Black women and girls is fact, not fiction.
Today, I hear the term sexual harassment being flippantly tossed around almost as if it were a joke. I don’t even know where we are in a struggle against abuse and harassment because we seem to have lost our way. But I know the fight must continue. I left the theater thankful for Anita Hill’s bravery on that October day back in 1991. She reminded me that even in the most adverse circumstances how important it is to continue to speak our truth to power. Sexual harassment and abuse of Black women and girls is fact, not fiction.
No comments:
Post a Comment